Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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