I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
