Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
