All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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