She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
