Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
