I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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