I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Randomize
