Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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