She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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