I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
