After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
