No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
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