Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize