just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
