Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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