so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize