and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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