I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
