I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize