Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
