Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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