I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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