I'd wear matching sweaters with you
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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