you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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