i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
