my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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