Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
