I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize