your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
