batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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