I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
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