Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
