Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize