It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
