Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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