Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
