I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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