i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
