She's JV to your varsity
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Randomize
