Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
