Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
