If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
So much rum. So many feels.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
