hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
