The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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