Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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