i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
