hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
