Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
