He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Randomize
